Christmas has been and gone and the New Year is right upon us.
As I take a moment to reflect upon recent days I realise I am indeed an old lady. While the childlike part of me still wishes for the Christmas holiday to be full of wonder and carols and sleepless excitement, the adult part of me yearns for the same thing it always does - rest.
We all came down with a stomach bug on Christmas Eve. The children spent two whole days and nights lingering in the bathroom while Dave and I wiped up messes, tears and our own disappointment at the lack of any real sleep.
What are the chances, really? A stomach bug for Christmas!?
My devastation was palpable.
For me Christmas is all about a hearty feast, champagne and salty ocean swims. This year the rain and impending sense of 'vomit' made our celebrations far more somber than usual. That and the fact that my darling brother and his wife left on an Australia wide adventure just days before. They were missed and things were quiet.
It just didn't feel like Christmas this year. It didn't even feel restful or rejuvenating.
But while I was schlepping about and morning the loss of my own Christmas Spirit, the children were filled with overwhelming joy at having most of their family at their immediate disposal. They relished in the opportunity to have at least four adults willing to construct lego, play catch and carefully place together puzzles.
They were overcome with the excitement of revealing cheap plastic toys, fishing rods, frisbees, body boards and books from unenthusiastically wrapped parcels - their gratitude was immediate and lasting.
This Christmas, I was again reminded of the selfless joy in parenting. While I was exhausted, sick and truth be told, a touch depressed, my kids were exhausted, stick and absolutely brimming with indescribable joy. So in their joy, I found mine.
Tonight, Dave and I will sit with a cheese platter and a cider and we will talk about the year that was. We'll make plans and resolutions for the year that is to come and tomorrow, when we rise, we'll start to live them.
See you tomorrow, love birds. For now...
H A P P Y N E W Y E A R
a new year, a new dream