Thursday, November 7, 2013
The Midnight Fight
I think well executed arguments are really great in a marriage. They help to keep things open and transparent. A good strong conversation can serve to clarify muddled situations. It can assist in keeping the lines of communication open and flowing fluidly. A good argument evokes passion and fire and lets be honest, a hefty dose of rage. It involves talking (loudly) and listening to resolve issues, conflicts and problems.
I consider arguments to be the sign of a healthy marriage.
To argue well, one must be well slept and capable of comprehending what is truly being discussed. One must be willing to be silent and listen, trying to read between the lines and understand both the spoken and unspoken causes of tension.
Dave and I argue well, umm, sometimes. When lack the ability to argue well, we make up for it in frequency.
Given our constant sleep deprived state, we bicker fairly often and from time to time we go all out and argue with complete abandon.
Usually we tussle over issues of spare time, house hold chores and feeling valued and valuable in our lives. You know, the full scope - from trivial to complex.
But we argue best at Midnight when the baby won't sleep and the big kids have wet their beds and the baby won't sleep and the baby won't sleep (why, oh WHY won't the baby sleep?).
Do you know the kind of argument I'm talking about here?
The one where you say outrageous irrational things and maybe even stomp your foot on the floor like a tantruming toddler. The one where you lash out and curse and try your hand a little bit of kung fu, before falling back into a blissful sleep state at the first available opportunity.
The useless argument.
The exhaustion induced argument.
The embarrassing argument.
Let's call it The Midnight Fight.
Tell me, do you find that having children has introduced the midnight fight into your home?
You may note that this is very poorly written, take it as evidence of my exhaustion.