Thursday, September 12, 2013

Are You Okay?


Today is national 'R U OK' day - a day dedicated to reminding us to have meaningful conversations with friends and family about our mental health.

I vividly remember the first time one of my friends intentionally asked me how I was. She said 'how are you Em, I mean, within yourself'. She clearly wasn't going to accept the rote 'yes, I'm well thanks' as an answer. 

Right there and then, in my 1991 red corolla wagon, we engaged in a deep and lengthy discussion about life, the universe and everything.

There were no conclusions, no resolutions. Just a frank open dialogue between two people who were both 'mostly okay'. And do you know what, I think 'mostly okay' is pretty normal.


So how are you, like, you know, within yourself?



the lifting of the fog

21 comments:

  1. Pretty good, now that I'm you know, like, up the duff. Thanks for asking. How are YOU doing? xx

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    1. ooh being duffed is ALWAYS my undoing!

      Stoked for you Joanna.

      xx em

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  2. Yeah considering every time I read 'r u ok' in people's status/feeds and burst into tears I'm going out on a limb and saying no.
    Time to get my brain looked at.

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    1. yep, been there. It's always my cue to call the counsellor and MANNNNN it's good to talk to someone objective and uninvolved. Hope you get what you need Astred but I can't help but say, I have so much respect for your brazen honesty.

      xo em

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    2. Erm, yeah bit of an over sharer but getting counseling is nothing to be ashamed of. :)

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    3. the counselling part, that it ;) ahaha

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  3. Great post. Sometimes I think motherhood makes me less of a friend who asks this question of my good mates as I get caught up with my kids and life's busyness. This has given me a good kick up the clacker to get back to being more aware of those who are close to me and check in with how they're travelling. Lord knows if I start doing that I may one day focus on reflecting on how I'm travelling!

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    1. i'm exactly the same. There just isn't enough time in the day!

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  4. i am a good within myself at this moment. we just moved into a new home recently and i feel safe and happy. our last home got burglarized while we were on vacation and ever since then i never felt safe and had many sleepless nights.

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    1. ps- thank you for asking and caring :)

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    2. oh no, that is awful. I'm so sorry to hear that.

      I hope you catch up on that rest and sleep peacefully in your new home

      xx

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  5. i am. for now! just did a similar post. the r u ok day needs to be every day. xx

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  6. I'm 'mostly ok'. So much stress and uncertainty in my life at the moment, it's rather unsettling. Hopefully in the next 3 months things will settle down and hopefully (fingers crossed) I'll get a bun in the oven. I think then I'll be more than mostly ok. I hope.

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    1. i think mostly is still pretty good but I do hope that, with time, you become TOTALLY okay ;)

      xo em

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    2. I think a bun sounds lovely Miss B xx

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    3. I hope that with time I'm totally okay too. The bun will help that along I hope!

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  7. I go between being 'mostly ok' to 'not so ok'. It's not postnatal depression but juggling being a mum to an amazing 11 month old girl & working part time is starting to catch up with me. That mixed with our financial situation (we're up s**t creek without a paddle basically!)In the past year we've had to replace our hot water system,our oven,our dishwasher, all the outside pipes & our car has broken down numerous times this year. We also had to say goodbye to our beautiful dog. I just had a mini-meltdown the other night & said to my husband 'why are we being punished?' because that's how it feels. I haven't been able to enjoy my first year as a mummy because i spend all my time so stressed out. I count my blessing every day for our daughter but i just can't see the light at the end of the tunnel right now. Thank you for asking the question R U OK, it feels good to let it out. Also, 2 men i know were lost to depression in the last 18 months & my hubby lost his best mate back in their 20's. More needs to be done to stop people ending their lives, it is ok to say 'i need help'

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  8. ahh when I comment on my phone it never works!!

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  9. To be honest I am getting to my happy state of mind again, but up until mid August I was a mess.

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Thanks so much for your words of encouragement, advice and solidarity.

xo em