In two days time Elke will be exactly three months old. She was born on the 1st of May at 1:30 in the afternoon with eyes wide and bright. The perfect baby sister for Zeph and Pip and a magical bundle for Dave and I.
Since that time I've felt pretty much like Shera - you know the princess of power. I've smashed solo trips* to Aldi, navigated all manner of breastfeeding multitasking, made dinner as many as 5 times, kept the floors vacuumed and diplomatically resolved at least 652 conflicts between my children. I have wiped tears, kissed grazed knees and spoken calmly whilst enforcing quiet time.
But today, TODAY, it all came undone.
It makes sense really given that the three month mark (since giving birth) is steadily approaching.
From memory, I've experienced a 3 month slump with each of my babies. When the pregnancy and new mum hormones wear off and reality kicks in... as in... reality kicks you in the metaphorical balls.
It's when you finally realise that you're still waking up in the night to feed a baby, that no-one else will sort the washing and that no amount of right eating and exercise will actually make you feel energised. Why? Because being a mother is bloody exhausting and nothing can compensate for extreme, long term lack of sleep.
Toady my children refused their quiet time** and insisted on acting like kids rather than the adult company I was hoping for.
You know what, it's not them. It's me. They haven't changed their behaviour, their attitude or their actions- I have.
Because I'm tired and my superpowers have worn off.
So tonight, over a tall glass of red I shall take stock and remind myself that it's me, not them that needs to keep this ship sailing. I am the parent and I will rise to the occasion.... tomorrow.
Superpowers or not.
*okay, make that trip, singular. I'm not crazy enough to attempt that again.
**They must have been onto me after yesterdays post, guess it was a little smug huh!