Thursday, August 16, 2012

Change, I Embrace You.


We've experiencing some dark days here at The Beetle Shack. There are situations surrounding us that we can not control or even influence. But we're pushing forward and working to see the good in change.

In my experience, change is often the catalyst for further change, so i'm embracing it and... you know... like, making changes.

Just small ones that might just be the ladder out of this rut.

Our usual routine includes engagements every day of the week. Each morning we rise before the sun and guzzle our  coffee before launching into our morning's activities. There's Pre School, Park, Play Group, and catch up's galore.

It's been fun and for the longest time, keeping busy has worked really well for us. My kids are happy when out of the house and have learnt to thrive in social situations, which was my hope way back here.

But more recently I've felt that the weeks are passing all too quickly and I'm not getting 'time' to spend with my children, I'm just supervising them.

So i've decided that we're going to drop an activity and focus on doing special things together. I figure if we have one morning a week dedicated just to 'us' then we can go on little adventures, bake in the kitchen, read extra stories and generally just hang out.

Change, I embrace you.


Soul Society Giveaway.


31 comments:

  1. Oh finding balance is oh so hard. I find when you have time to be at home and relax or catch up or really - just be able to do things in your own space - you enjoy your outings just that little bit more.

    Feeling for you at the moment. You've achieved so much in your short years and are wise beyond your years ... don't ever forget that!

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  2. Hi, come and spend a day with Rowan and I....

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  3. What ever it is, I hope it treats you kindly. Having just found your blog I am so enjoying it, and hope you find all these people here reading a shiny part of the day!

    We were where you are a few months ago, and did exactly the same. Now Fridays are free day, and we do craft or walk or sometimes just recover from the week! It's great to know on Thursday afternoon that there is no rush tomorrow, no need to even change out of jammies if we don't want too!

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  4. Hang in there, the sun will come out again. But it's best to stay home so you can see how it transforms everything!

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  5. we have a 'day at home' once or twice a week, i think you need it! i don't want to get in the car every day to go just somewhere, i think these home days help us all to relax a bit. plus it's cheaper hehe

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  6. I hear you Em, it's so hard being at home with little ones - whatever I do, I always feel like I should be doing it better, or different, or more, or less! I think time spent at home is important, to just connect with them and have some quiet time together. You seem like an amazing person, and a wonderful mother. Take care lovely, and know that sunshine follows a storm...Rachel xx

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  7. Oh Em.... hope you are all right love. Biggest hugs to you across the globe. Sometimes is good to nest, do simple things. Cook, bake, eat, hug and sleep... that's it. Enjoy your peaceful times with your babes... reading books and making dens all morning sometimes ain't that bad. xxx

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  8. I can't do that kind of pace. The less scheduled when my kids were very young, the better. I like to leave enough space for them to get truly, utterly bored, 'cos that's when the magic happens.

    I hope things are looking up for you all. It's hard to read that on blogs sometimes and know that we are powerless to help a family doing it tough. x

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  9. This post resonated with me. We're so busy with playgroup and mothers group and tiny tots and library nursery rhymes, that sometimes we miss enjoying the little moments. So today I made the decision to do nothing with my children- we stayed home, and stayed in our pyjamas, and played and read books, and blew bubbles, and had a lovely day. I literally did no cleaning- on account of I was writing a post on doing nothing, to identify what I actually did! Happy baking!

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  10. It is hard. This pace doesn't work for us either, and yet I find myself doing a similar thing. I find toddlerhood really hard indoors. But then I like to stay indoors. It's a vicious circle.

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  11. I hadn't read your blog for a while and note your posts have become more personal. I really feel we all go through the whole parenting transition thing. The highs and the lows - those fabulous days, and those days you wish you could have all over again. You are coping well. It's a juggling game, and I think it is for 20 odd years! Lean on the great support you have! Best wishes. Alison

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  12. Oh yes, outings are fun but I felt like my kids almost didn't know how to just PLAY, at HOME with the amount of things we were doing. Yes, weird. I think I was so terrified of being a shut in when Sunny was first born that I embraced the 'just get out of the house' mentality. Now it is too much... so we don't do swimming lessons or ballet or gymbaroo or all the other "extra curricula" activities that I used to schedule the girls to death with - we have three days completely free to stay home. Sometimes we have a play date or I catch up on work while the kids are nannied. Change is good, especially when it means you can hang in your jammies for at least one morning a week (or all day - I'm not judging!!)

    xx Lou

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  13. I am working full time this month...only for a month thank goodness...and I am so missing my time with my baby!
    I too generally embrace the let's get out of the house attitude...even if it is only to the front yard. But right now all I want to do is spend a lazy day with Baby C at home!

    Good luck with the change!

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  14. this sounds like a lovely change for you em. I take my hat off to you, I have always leant toward slow days with the kids so young, I can't handle too much in one week! and they can't either, not enough time at home eventually ends in tears and behaviour of the unfavourable kind. I hope this small change brings some calm for you all x

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  15. Saaaaame! It's good to get out and do stuff but I find I need one morning a week to hang out in our jims and foof around.
    No more than one or I start to go bonkers.

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  16. Love this Em, you sound a very dedicated mother. Don't get to hard on yourself, lovely to have that slow-down time though! Pray to God bout those tuff times eh! x

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  17. After Nora was born, I've found I've had to slow down. Now we only have two set activity mornings. The rest of the week, I just go with the flow. It is lovely, sometimes we head out, mostly we stay in. Wishing you peace and calm ... well as much as possible with two young ones.

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  18. Good for you. I hope the change brings about a little more calm and breathing space. A little bit of extra cuddles in bed before you really have to get up. I thought at first I was just being lazy, but they are going to go off to school all too soon, and it really is the lazy, slow days I relish so much. As long as you don't start looking at all the chores that need doing, and focusing on them instead. Its a hard balancing act.

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  19. I just finished reading 'Simplicity Parenting'. The author would highly approve of you decision. I think it's easy to fall into the trap of thinking kids need more more more more more. When really they just need you and some time and attention. Good luck. I bet your one day becomes the best day of the week (especially if you schedule an evening out for yourself that night to recover!!!!!) xxx

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  20. Hmmm, I get this Em. You have penned it more eloquently than I could have positioned it, but I also have been so focused on getting out and getting busy these past few weeks, that I feel I am just the 'carer'. Sounds weird because I'm a bloody hands on carer... 24/7 like... but still, I know what you mean. I have been trying to segment the days this week into quality one-on-one time with each child, some outings and some downtime in the afternoons. I think Motherhood would do well to have a quarterly business plan, like any successful corporation.
    Hope the dark days are behind you before you know it xo

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  21. It's a good plan, and I really hope your mornings are full of fun and joy. I kept deliberately busy to distract myself from how miserable I was at , and now I try to keep my diary empty - I greedily want to suck every last day of time with my two, especially as my youngest starts nursery soon. Change is good. Take care. xx

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  22. I've just found your blog and it's so absolutely stunning. But beyond that, I read your words here and the words on the post linked to "dark days," and I can so relate. I hate feeling a slave to my emotions, but we are emotional creatures. I'm going to read some more to get to know you better; but even just after this first read, you'll be on my mind and in my prayers. Following along now and hoping that things turn for you soon.

    Love,
    Sarah
    the Reverie blog

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  23. this parenting gig is hard, huh?!
    and in fact WE are facing a situation beyond our control too.
    and it sucks balls.
    I don't know if we'll ever get it all "right", this parenting think i mean.
    but I know that there's no expectation that we do either.
    and I love that.

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  24. Oooooh ... and you know what... those kiddies just Luuuuuurve you so much and they'll devour anything adventure to come - simple or small. I'm celebrating my son's birthday today (FOOURTEEN!!! Eeek) Seriously ... swish ... swish.. swish... (years screaming past in a blur) It's all so crazy cool and crazy scary and crazy crazy fun. Your changes are going to be WICKED. Sending you mucho inspiration and clear skies for treasure hunting and little people fun stuff!! Whooo Hooo! :-)

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  25. it's a good journey to pursue.

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  26. Emily, Sometimes cancelling all the uneccessary is all that it takes! I have done this at times when I feel stressed. It means you can do whatever, whenever and without time restraints. That is half the problem isn't it...rush, rush, rush. One more thing that I think would really help you is to schedule CREATIVITY. You seem like such a creative person and with out time for creative persuits, a creative person becomes a bit of a lost soul. That is my experience anyway. Doesn't matter if it is craft, art, photography, cooking or making cubby houses. I am sure tat you will be totally awesome what ever changes you make!

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  27. I have been thinking along these lines too... Life is just so busy busy busy...

    I am going to schedule an afternoon where I just DO something with my poppets: no distractions. Whether it be baking, or colouring, or a craft... just something that is sacred 'mummy time' where I can make sure I KNOW my kids and that they can get to KNOW me more. It is going to be great.

    All the best with the changes... it must be in the air, because it is blowing this way too...

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  28. I hope it all turns out ok,
    Our days are super busy too & now that next year she is going to school, I feel like the days are going past way to fast that I want to stop it & want to try to enjoy her as much as I can.

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  29. Thanks for this post Em, I feel like life is flying by oh so fast and I am just doing everything to keep up. I really must find the time to just be with the boys and baking is always a favourite.

    I have never been a scheduled activity person, I'm fine for a few weeks then something inside me wants to rebel against going somewhere the same time, same place every week! xx

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Thanks so much for your words of encouragement, advice and solidarity.

xo em